Thursday Again

So, it's Thursday once again and I think that I will spend tonight alone in my apartment. Lynley won't be home until nine when I go to pick her up, but even then it's not likely that we will really hang out, per se.

Of course, when is the last time that I've really hung out with anyone? I mean, in the looser sense, I've hung out with people and we've done stuff, but it's never been the sort of intense hang out sessions that I used to have when I was home.

Even still, Thursdays used to be the night that I would look forward to for the entire week. It was the night when I'd get to go over to Ryon's socialize with people, eat a good meal of interesting food that I helped to create, and just generally unwind. It was nice, even if the people there never really connected with me on a personal level.

I stopped going to Thursdays as major experiment to be able to tell who was really my friend and who didn't actually give a crap about me. I figured that if anyone really cared about me, they'd at least ask what's up, if not try and convince me to come back to Thursdays. So far, only two people have done either of those things and that's Spencer and Jess. I figured that Amish Jon, Jenn, or at least Ryon would, if nothing else, might say something. However, they haven't. Well, I take that back. Jenn has asked me why I stopped coming, but she didn't offer any solace when I told her that I just didn't feel welcome. I don't think any of them are too terribly concerned that I stopped coming.

As for the rest of them, I'll be surprised if they even noticed. I'm certain Uhl noticed since my presence makes her uncomfortable because of what happened between us. I doubt anyone even asked if I was going to show up the past couple of times I haven't shown up.

It really sucks sometimes when your friends prove you right.